Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No.What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
No can serve as a litmus test to the strength of our relationships...if you cannot say no to some of the things some of the time you are not being loved or valued, you are being controlled. What makes it hard is that I put everyone else's needs and priorities above my own. I wish to be accepted. Plus, I am a peace maker, people pleaser. Plus, I am kind. There are people out there willing to take advantage of that. I would like to say "no" more often when my adult children ask me to do things that they are fully capable of doing for themselves. I also would like to tell myself "no" more when it's evening on a school day and I am still at my desk so that I do have some energy left for other areas of my life! The need to sharpen my axe is real.
'Saying no to one thing, may mean saying yes to another.'
Opportunities may pop up on the daily-- ensuring that your time bank is being used wisely and in ways that enhance your living is so important. Ultimately, the time is spent but determining how and where you want it spent, knowing that you DO get to choose is important. Becuase I would like to say yes to more time spent with family and encouraging students to love learning, I want to say no to overcommitting to meetings that take away from passionate learning, so I can say yes to spending time fostering interests in my children and students. I want to say no to indecisiveness that prolongs too many options and commit (if even just for now) to planning and follow through. I think we are losing a lot of opportunities wishing and wondering instead of trying!
My favorite two lines from this Ted Talks is "We view saying yes as the path of least resistance, leading us to bite off more than we can chew" and "Saying no is a form of self care." It's extremely hard for me to say no. I enjoy making others happy and like showing that I'm a team player so I often say yes when opportunities arise or people ask me for help. I'd like to try to say no to things that don't fulfill me, even if they fulfill others. I'd like to start saying no to things that take time away from myself and my family.
My favorite line was "Live Better- Do Less". I have a hard time saying no. I have gotten better through the years but it is still something I have to work on. I hate the thought of letting someone down or not doing enough. Habit Seven for Leader in Me is Sharpen the Saw- Take Care of Yourself. Teaching my students this habit has made me reflect on my own life and to try to make sure I am taking care of myself so I can take care of others. I need to keep working on saying no and realizing that I don't have to do it all!
Tanya Petterson I don't like the word no to be said to me. Therefore, I will always say yes when somebody asks me to do something. I will usually have more on my plate than I can possibly do. I feel like if I say no, I am letting someone down. I need to learn to take care of myself and my well-being. I also need to "live better--do less"--a favorite line from the Ted talk.
'Saying no is a form of self care. It is the only choice of living a fruitful life.' This sentence is just one of the many sayings I liked about this Ted Talk. I have a really hard time saying no, just like so many others. I feel like when I say, no, I am being selfish. If I say, no, it just makes someone else have to do the job. I have gotten better at the age of 62 to just START saying, no, to some things. Maybe it is my age, but, I've never been a 'me' person, but, now at my age I am starting to realize that I absolutely NEED to start taking care of myself. I can't keep going at the pace I am going: teaching full time and volunteering for things every night. It it time to start saying, no, and not feel guilty about it.
A few of my favorite lines: There are times you just shouldn't eat another bite... The ability to say no is one of the most important skills you can have... If we don't say yes... we might miss out Negative lingers longer than Positive - insult vs compliment, one no vs. one yes Saying No is a form of self-care - Say Yes to saying NO Our no to one thing, becomes Yes to another! So that we can savor every bite without over indulging.
I'm getting better at saying no. I have always struggled with being a people pleaser - and I realize I often don't say no, because then I can do it "my way". At work, I've been trying to be better at delegating tasks, realizing I don't always have to be the one to do it.
"Saying no is a form on self- care" This quote from William really stood out to me. I often times let my people pleasing take over when it comes to saying no. I don't was to upset others or let people down so saying no can be difficult to me. I need to remember that it is ok to say no and take care of myself.
The ability to say no is one of the most important skills you can have. I don't have a hard time saying no to others but one thing I have had to learn is to say no to myself, because I am always trying to do more and more things, this year I have cut way back on "extras". Where in the past any idea I had I would make happen, to either boost morale or give people a pick me up. This year I have been more intentional about the things I am doing, to not to everything but do one thing really well.
My favorite line stated by William Clark Dare To Say No was:
"Replace yes with, I'll think about it."
I liked this line because it seems very reasonable; and I know I could comfortably respond using these words when I'm being asked to do task! Often I feel pressured to just automatically say "yes" to please others, without thinking through the situation. I'd like to start replacing the yes answer with, "I'll think about it". This response will give me more time to thing if I really want to do this task. It will also give me an idea on how to politely say no, if I decide that is in my best interest. I need to start putting myself first, and I believe saying "no" more often is my first step.
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often? I loved the analogy of saying no to food, and saying no to doing everything we are asked to do by those around us. Being a people pleaser and "peace maker" makes it hard for me to say no. I don't like conflict or feeling like I'm letting others down. But I have gotten better about having boundaries when it comes to my time. In the future, I think I should consider saying no to some volunteer activities so that I do not get burnt out on doing too much. I also should consider saying no to some family gatherings, as that is probably the hardest thing for me to say no to.
I found the analogy to grandma's dinner very helpful and interesting. I had never thought of it like that before, but saying "yes!" to too many things is the same thing as saying "yes" to one more bite of dinner over and over again. Over consumption of food, television, social media, alcohol, etc. is all condemned, BUT for some reason we live in a world where overconsumption of our time in saying "yes" to every inquiry that comes our way seems to be expected. There is definitely power and freedom in saying "no" and I think that is beneficial for the individual and the organization.
“By allowing ourselves to set boundaries to protect those tasks that are most important to us, our “no” to one thing, becomes a “yes” to another....”
I am innately a people pleaser and get a high from being helpful to people. I love when tasks that are not a big deal for me can make someone else's day easier. It is hard to say no when I know in the long run doing that task is not a big deal. However, every time I say "yes" to a task that is out of the realm of my typical day, I am saying "no" to either part of my job, or using my free time the way I want to. I would like to start saying "no" to some requests when they require me to travel to other libraries. Sometimes I do enjoy this and it is more hobby work than real work, but being able to say "no" more often to these tasks would allow me to say "yes" to less time away from my kids on weeknights.
Saying no is very difficult for me because I am fulfilled and happy when I can help and serve others. My husband used to joke and say he was going to tattoo the word NO on my forehead. While he was always joking, I eventually came to the conclusion that I was spreading myself to thin and becoming angry and bitter with tasks that used to bring me great joy. As I grow older, I am better at being honest with myself and giving myself permission to say no. With that being said, I do have personal and professional areas in which I need to work on saying no. In my personal life, there are times I need to tell my adult children no and not feel guilty about it. In my professional work, there are times I need to tell families that I can not accommodate their wishes (this might be scheduling a home visit way after hours or going out of my way to deliver a resource).
“Saying no is a form of self-care.” I think being a teacher in a small district makes it hard for me to say no. With having less staff and resources, we are expected to wear many hats. With my personal life, I tend to be a people pleaser and have a hard time saying no to things or social situations even when I really don’t want to go. One thing I really want to work on is being honest from the start instead of agreeing to something I really don’t want to do or saying yes and then trying to get out of it later.
“Just as it is necessary for your physical health to brush your teeth and shower so too is it imperative to on occasion say no. If we are going to take control of our own lives we must acknowledge that in our society no is unfairly branded as a forbidden fruit. In fact saying this little two letter word may be our only chance at living a truly fruitful life. This brings us to the main course we will never be able to change our compulsion to do too much unless we affirm the value that no possesses.” I've always been the person who says yes because I believe if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself—a mindset my father instilled in me at a young age. I struggle to let others handle tasks I know I could do better or faster, often saying yes just to ensure things get done. This need for control affects every aspect of my life, and I know I need to let go—even if things don’t get done my way or on my timeline. Saying no is difficult for me because being busy makes me feel in control, even when my life feels like a mess.
The line that spoke to me most was: "Saying no is a form of self care." I have always had a hard time saying no to things. Looking back I have definitely said yes to several things that I should've said no to. The older I get the more I try to focus on self care. I think as teachers and mothers, we get into the bad habit of always putting ourselves last. He also talked about listening to your body. When saying yes gives you a tightness in your chest and stomach, you should consider saying no. I feel like that's a very good tip.
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often? My favorite line by William Clark was, " Saying no is a form of self care." I definitely have people pleasing tendencies, it is really hard for me to say no to family and other teachers who I look up to. If I really need some time at home alone to relax and destress and family or a coworker asks me to do something it is really hard to say no without guilt and fear I am going to miss something. Those are the instances I want to start saying no to, as well as when my grade level team comes up with a really fun project or activity to the students and I feel it just wouldn't be as beneficial for my students as it would be work for me, I would like to say no and feel guilt free about it.
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
My favorite line was "Saying no is a form of self care". I often have a hard time saying no to other teachers. I feel guilty/bad when I say no especially when its to other teachers. I liked that he gave the alternative to no was "I'll think about it". This would give me time to really think about my decision and see if the task would be worth my time or not! I also am going to remember that saying no is OKAY and people won't hate me just because I said no!
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often? "Saying no is a form of Self Care." For most of my life I thought my value came from saying yes and doing, doing, and doing more. Then I realized that no matter how much I do it does not matter-people do not see everything I do. I just became more and more tired. I actually put a note up in my home that read, "it is ok for you to say no." How ridiculous is that. But, it helped. Gradually I have gotten much better at saying no.
The one line that stood out to me was "Saying no is a form of self care." The older I have become, I have learned that saying "no" is not that difficult to say. I find it actually relieves some of the stress and pressure that others place on you when expecting the words "yes" Often, I am asked to join another committee for school, I learned that it ok to say no and to be ok with it. You need to take care of your needs and wants first and saying no is ok.
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
ReplyDeleteNo can serve as a litmus test to the strength of our relationships...if you cannot say no to some of the things some of the time you are not being loved or valued, you are being controlled. What makes it hard is that I put everyone else's needs and priorities above my own. I wish to be accepted. Plus, I am a peace maker, people pleaser. Plus, I am kind. There are people out there willing to take advantage of that.
I would like to say "no" more often when my adult children ask me to do things that they are fully capable of doing for themselves. I also would like to tell myself "no" more when it's evening on a school day and I am still at my desk so that I do have some energy left for other areas of my life! The need to sharpen my axe is real.
'Saying no to one thing, may mean saying yes to another.'
ReplyDeleteOpportunities may pop up on the daily-- ensuring that your time bank is being used wisely and in ways that enhance your living is so important. Ultimately, the time is spent but determining how and where you want it spent, knowing that you DO get to choose is important. Becuase I would like to say yes to more time spent with family and encouraging students to love learning, I want to say no to overcommitting to meetings that take away from passionate learning, so I can say yes to spending time fostering interests in my children and students. I want to say no to indecisiveness that prolongs too many options and commit (if even just for now) to planning and follow through. I think we are losing a lot of opportunities wishing and wondering instead of trying!
My favorite two lines from this Ted Talks is "We view saying yes as the path of least resistance, leading us to bite off more than we can chew" and "Saying no is a form of self care." It's extremely hard for me to say no. I enjoy making others happy and like showing that I'm a team player so I often say yes when opportunities arise or people ask me for help. I'd like to try to say no to things that don't fulfill me, even if they fulfill others. I'd like to start saying no to things that take time away from myself and my family.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite line was "Live Better- Do Less". I have a hard time saying no. I have gotten better through the years but it is still something I have to work on. I hate the thought of letting someone down or not doing enough. Habit Seven for Leader in Me is Sharpen the Saw- Take Care of Yourself. Teaching my students this habit has made me reflect on my own life and to try to make sure I am taking care of myself so I can take care of others. I need to keep working on saying no and realizing that I don't have to do it all!
ReplyDeleteTanya Petterson
ReplyDeleteI don't like the word no to be said to me. Therefore, I will always say yes when somebody asks me to do something. I will usually have more on my plate than I can possibly do. I feel like if I say no, I am letting someone down. I need to learn to take care of myself and my well-being. I also need to "live better--do less"--a favorite line from the Ted talk.
'Saying no is a form of self care. It is the only choice of living a fruitful life.' This sentence is just one of the many sayings I liked about this Ted Talk. I have a really hard time saying no, just like so many others. I feel like when I say, no, I am being selfish. If I say, no, it just makes someone else have to do the job. I have gotten better at the age of 62 to just START saying, no, to some things. Maybe it is my age, but, I've never been a 'me' person, but, now at my age I am starting to realize that I absolutely NEED to start taking care of myself. I can't keep going at the pace I am going: teaching full time and volunteering for things every night. It it time to start saying, no, and not feel guilty about it.
ReplyDeleteA few of my favorite lines:
ReplyDeleteThere are times you just shouldn't eat another bite...
The ability to say no is one of the most important skills you can have...
If we don't say yes... we might miss out
Negative lingers longer than Positive - insult vs compliment, one no vs. one yes
Saying No is a form of self-care - Say Yes to saying NO
Our no to one thing, becomes Yes to another! So that we can savor every bite without over indulging.
I'm getting better at saying no. I have always struggled with being a people pleaser - and I realize I often don't say no, because then I can do it "my way". At work, I've been trying to be better at delegating tasks, realizing I don't always have to be the one to do it.
"Saying no is a form on self- care" This quote from William really stood out to me. I often times let my people pleasing take over when it comes to saying no. I don't was to upset others or let people down so saying no can be difficult to me. I need to remember that it is ok to say no and take care of myself.
ReplyDeleteThe ability to say no is one of the most important skills you can have. I don't have a hard time saying no to others but one thing I have had to learn is to say no to myself, because I am always trying to do more and more things, this year I have cut way back on "extras". Where in the past any idea I had I would make happen, to either boost morale or give people a pick me up. This year I have been more intentional about the things I am doing, to not to everything but do one thing really well.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite line stated by William Clark Dare To Say No was:
ReplyDelete"Replace yes with, I'll think about it."
I liked this line because it seems very reasonable; and I know I could comfortably respond using these words when I'm being asked to do task! Often I feel pressured to just automatically say "yes" to please others, without thinking through the situation. I'd like to start replacing the yes answer with, "I'll think about it". This response will give me more time to thing if I really want to do this task. It will also give me an idea on how to politely say no, if I decide that is in my best interest. I need to start putting myself first, and I believe saying "no" more often is my first step.
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
ReplyDeleteI loved the analogy of saying no to food, and saying no to doing everything we are asked to do by those around us. Being a people pleaser and "peace maker" makes it hard for me to say no. I don't like conflict or feeling like I'm letting others down. But I have gotten better about having boundaries when it comes to my time. In the future, I think I should consider saying no to some volunteer activities so that I do not get burnt out on doing too much. I also should consider saying no to some family gatherings, as that is probably the hardest thing for me to say no to.
I found the analogy to grandma's dinner very helpful and interesting. I had never thought of it like that before, but saying "yes!" to too many things is the same thing as saying "yes" to one more bite of dinner over and over again. Over consumption of food, television, social media, alcohol, etc. is all condemned, BUT for some reason we live in a world where overconsumption of our time in saying "yes" to every inquiry that comes our way seems to be expected. There is definitely power and freedom in saying "no" and I think that is beneficial for the individual and the organization.
ReplyDelete“By allowing ourselves to set boundaries to protect those tasks that are most important to us, our “no” to one thing, becomes a “yes” to another....”
ReplyDeleteI am innately a people pleaser and get a high from being helpful to people. I love when tasks that are not a big deal for me can make someone else's day easier. It is hard to say no when I know in the long run doing that task is not a big deal. However, every time I say "yes" to a task that is out of the realm of my typical day, I am saying "no" to either part of my job, or using my free time the way I want to. I would like to start saying "no" to some requests when they require me to travel to other libraries. Sometimes I do enjoy this and it is more hobby work than real work, but being able to say "no" more often to these tasks would allow me to say "yes" to less time away from my kids on weeknights.
Saying no is very difficult for me because I am fulfilled and happy when I can help and serve others. My husband used to joke and say he was going to tattoo the word NO on my forehead. While he was always joking, I eventually came to the conclusion that I was spreading myself to thin and becoming angry and bitter with tasks that used to bring me great joy. As I grow older, I am better at being honest with myself and giving myself permission to say no. With that being said, I do have personal and professional areas in which I need to work on saying no. In my personal life, there are times I need to tell my adult children no and not feel guilty about it. In my professional work, there are times I need to tell families that I can not accommodate their wishes (this might be scheduling a home visit way after hours or going out of my way to deliver a resource).
ReplyDelete“Saying no is a form of self-care.” I think being a teacher in a small district makes it hard for me to say no. With having less staff and resources, we are expected to wear many hats. With my personal life, I tend to be a people pleaser and have a hard time saying no to things or social situations even when I really don’t want to go. One thing I really want to work on is being honest from the start instead of agreeing to something I really don’t want to do or saying yes and then trying to get out of it later.
ReplyDelete“Just as it is necessary for your physical health to brush your teeth and shower so too is it imperative to on occasion say no. If we are going to take control of our own lives we must acknowledge that in our society no is unfairly branded as a forbidden fruit. In fact saying this little two letter word may be our only chance at living a truly fruitful life. This brings us to the main course we will never be able to change our compulsion to do too much unless we affirm the value that no possesses.” I've always been the person who says yes because I believe if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself—a mindset my father instilled in me at a young age. I struggle to let others handle tasks I know I could do better or faster, often saying yes just to ensure things get done. This need for control affects every aspect of my life, and I know I need to let go—even if things don’t get done my way or on my timeline. Saying no is difficult for me because being busy makes me feel in control, even when my life feels like a mess.
ReplyDeleteThe line that spoke to me most was: "Saying no is a form of self care." I have always had a hard time saying no to things. Looking back I have definitely said yes to several things that I should've said no to. The older I get the more I try to focus on self care. I think as teachers and mothers, we get into the bad habit of always putting ourselves last. He also talked about listening to your body. When saying yes gives you a tightness in your chest and stomach, you should consider saying no. I feel like that's a very good tip.
ReplyDeleteShare your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
ReplyDeleteMy favorite line by William Clark was, " Saying no is a form of self care." I definitely have people pleasing tendencies, it is really hard for me to say no to family and other teachers who I look up to. If I really need some time at home alone to relax and destress and family or a coworker asks me to do something it is really hard to say no without guilt and fear I am going to miss something. Those are the instances I want to start saying no to, as well as when my grade level team comes up with a really fun project or activity to the students and I feel it just wouldn't be as beneficial for my students as it would be work for me, I would like to say no and feel guilt free about it.
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
ReplyDeleteMy favorite line was "Saying no is a form of self care". I often have a hard time saying no to other teachers. I feel guilty/bad when I say no especially when its to other teachers. I liked that he gave the alternative to no was "I'll think about it". This would give me time to really think about my decision and see if the task would be worth my time or not! I also am going to remember that saying no is OKAY and people won't hate me just because I said no!
Share your favorite line or analogy stated by William Clark in his talk, Dare To Say No. What makes it hard for you to say no? Why may you, and in what instances, would you like to consider saying no more often?
ReplyDelete"Saying no is a form of Self Care." For most of my life I thought my value came from saying yes and doing, doing, and doing more. Then I realized that no matter how much I do it does not matter-people do not see everything I do. I just became more and more tired. I actually put a note up in my home that read, "it is ok for you to say no." How ridiculous is that. But, it helped. Gradually I have gotten much better at saying no.
The one line that stood out to me was "Saying no is a form of self care." The older I have become, I have learned that saying "no" is not that difficult to say. I find it actually relieves some of the stress and pressure that others place on you when expecting the words "yes" Often, I am asked to join another committee for school, I learned that it ok to say no and to be ok with it. You need to take care of your needs and wants first and saying no is ok.
ReplyDelete